It took a while for the sun to find us again, what with all the trees and moody clouds in the way. The clouds werenโt the heavy Oregon kind that push all the air out of your chest and make Mom as jumpy as if a cereal killer were hiding behind the next tree. Instead, Washington clouds were the kind that a real sun could burn off by lunch time. Its first rays found us as the Wagon pulled up to the trailhead.
I sniffed the air and the loamy smell set my tail wagging. โI knew Washington would be great,โ I told Mom so she wouldnโt make up her own mind first. The delicious stench pulled my nose toward a log fence outlining an area of packed dirt and dry, flattened turds. โHorses poop here, Mom! Lots of them, by the smell of it!โ I looked from her face to the fenced-in dirt and back to her face again to make sure she got it. โDo you think theyโre already up the trail? Letโs catch up.โ
โHold your horses, Spud,โ Mom strained against the leash like she was the one holding back a whole herd of wild horses. โI donโt think anyoneโs here, but I want get through the horse camp before I let you off the leash.โ
โYouโre doing it wrong!โ I whimpered. โYouโre supposed to drop the leash because there might be horses around. You wouldnโt even know what to do with a horse if you met one, Mom. Youโd probably scream and run away from them.โ
We kept walking, past one horse pen after another. With so many log fences, itโs a wonder there was any forest left on the other side.
โSheesh. You could keep a whole cavalry brigade here,โ Mom said.
โDo you really think there's a whole parade of them out there?โ I asked, looking toward the trees. I caught a whiff of something even more exciting than a horse parade drifting from the woods behind the last horse-cage. I stopped for a better sniff.
โGood boy,โ Mom said, thinking I was sitting because of the pressure sheโd been putting on my collar. She leaned over and unclipped the leash.
A moon-colored streak of fur flashed through the forest and was gone faster than a shooting star. Now that I didnโt have to wait for Mom anymore, I launched myself after it at warp speed.
The forest around me blurred as I chased the pale streak until it was little more than a scent.
Behind me, Mom was shouting like a seagull with a horse standing on his toe, but there was no time to worry about Mom. She could never catch my canine pace anyway. I let her squawks fade into the background like birdsong.
I lost the scent of the streak for a moment and stopped to find my bearings. Momโs screams were so pathetic that I was about to turn back and check on her, when a twig snapped somewhere in the brush beside me. I forgot all about Mom and kept chasing.
When I finally lost the mysterious scent for good, I looked around. I was surrounded by a Jillian identical trees. If it werenโt for Momโs crowing, I might never have known which way to go. I found her by echolocation like a dolphin, following her squawks like the pings of the worldโs most obnoxious submarine.
โOSCAR! OOOOOOOSSSSS-CAAAAAAAAAAr!โ she shrieked, forgetting the rrrrr sound at the end of my name like she sometimes does when sheโs shouting, mad, or both. โOscar, fraudspammit, get back here!โ
When I found her standing alone on the trail, her face was twisted from the effort of all that screaming. Dogs donโt understand blue, but I was pretty sure this was what it meant to scream until youโre blue in the face. Thank goodness she hadnโt screamed her whole head clear off yet.
โMom! Guess what!โ I wagged. The blue melted out of her face as I got within petting distance. โYouโll never guess who I just chased! He was extra fluffy andโโ
โOh my Dog! Never do that again!โ Mom grabbed me in a headlock and smooshed my face with messy kisses. โYou scared the dog doo out of me!โ
โYeah, itโs nice to see you, too...โ I said, eager to move on to more exciting news. โBut youโll never guess who I almost-saw! Go on! Guess!โ
Mom was already being so grabby that I didnโt even notice that she had my collar until I heard the leash click back on.
โGood idea! Donโt ruin the surprise. Letโs chase him together.โ I took off in the direction where I last smelled him.
I didnโt get far before the leash pinned me down like an anchor. โI donโt mean to ruin the surprise or anything...โ I leaned into my collar for extra suspense, โBut I think thereโs a wolf in there somewhere!โ
โMmmhmm,โ Mom hummed, but in that way where agreeing is supposed to show Iโm wrong. โYou know thereโs a story about that, right?โ
โI know. You think just because Iโm a dog I canโt appreciate litter-ature?โ To prove I really did know the story, I recited:
โHey spittle piddle,
โThe cat played the fiddle,
โAnd who gets to lick the spoon?
โThe brave dog chased,
โBut the wolf went into space,
โAnd they chased each other over the moon.โ
Mom gave me a long look like she wasnโt sure if I was joking. โI was thinking of the Boy who Cried Wolf,โ she said finally.
โThatโs a fun one, too,โ I said. โI think itโs only a myth, though. Unfortunately. If the wolf really does eat the boy at the end, do you think heโll share a helping with us? Iโve never tried boy before.โ
โI still think youโre missing the point of the story.โ
โI still think youโre silly to be scared of somewolf you havenโt even met yet,โ I told her. โYou'll never make friends with that attitude.โ
I dragged Mom tripping and grumbling into the the woods.
โStop pulling!โ Mom whined for the gaJillianth time.
โNo, you stop pulling on the leash and keep up,โ I urged.
โSomething bad is gonna happen, I just know it,โ she whined. โYou jerking me around is just making me even more anxious. Go easy. Iโm still getting over watching you get swept away a dozen times yesterday.โ
I let up on the leash, just a little. If I got away, Mom would never pull a Hollywood-furteen, Westminster-ten like me again. I was out of her league. Losing me would probably be devastating for an uggo like her.
I led Mom into the woods at a slow-motion pace that was more her speed. The trees lined up one behind the other to block our view of anything but the next turn. It was like those moving pictures Momโs loaptop shows when itโs bored where I can never tell if Iโm looking at the same picture over and over, or something new each time.
At long last, Mom got tired of pulling and stopped altogether. โFine, go. See if I care.โ She reached down and unhooked the leash again.
โI thought youโd never come to your senses!โ I called over my shoulder as I zoomed up the trail.
But I only made it a few steps before the trail twisted away and left nothing but infinitrees falling one behind the other down a slope too steep to be fun for chasing anything. I followed where the trail was leading, but it just turned me around backward until I was watching Mom catch up through a single layer of trees.
โSee? Thereโs nowhere to go,โ Mom hollered to me, or the woods, or the wolf. โYou might as well just hang out with me.โ She shook the baggie with my brunch kibble in it. โCโmere, Spud!โ
I looked over my shoulder at the endless layers of trees. My tummy grumbled.
โOkay,โ I said, meeting her at the tip of the turn. I took a faceful of kibble as payment. โMmf. I was just testing you,โ I chewed, โto see if youโd follow when I let you off leash.โ
Mom gave me a gimme-a-break look.
โAnd you passed!โ I wagged.
I led her through the trees for a millionty turns until I couldnโt bear to take another step at her two-legged pace. When I could take it no more, I tested if I could pull her with the invisible leash that connects us in our minds.
I ran ahead until Mom yanked on the imaginary leash by calling for me to wait up. I did wait for a breath or two, but not enough for her catch up all the way. When she looked down at the Witch again, I took a few more steps than the last time before she shouted again.
โStay close, Oscar!โ Mom hollered, barely looking up from the Witch as she did.
Thatโs the problem with the psychic telepaphone between a dog and his momโshe doesnโt even have to look up to know where I am.
โBut youโre going so slow!โ I said.
โIโm just looking to see if Wilbur has gotten back to me yet. And looking at the forums to see what other people have done when their Facebook pages disappear.โ
โWhat do they know? Only you could lose a dog whoโs hiking right in front of you.โ
โAccording to these people on Reddit, it doesnโt look good for you, Spud.โ Mom wagged her head sadly. โI swear, if I... I mean, if you lose that page...โ
Thereโs no sense in listening to prophesies you canโt do anything about, so I went back to testing the limits of my invisible leash. It wasnโt really speeding Mom up, but I could stretch the telepaphone cord more if I paused for a moment before she told me to stay close. I started listening for the sound of her looking up so I could be waiting like a good boy whenever she checked on me.
When she looked back down again, I took one step... two... three... foโ
Mom looked up from the Witch again. โStay close.โ
I waited, but she only chased for a step before her eyes dropped back to the Witch.
I was about to set a new telepaphone-stretching record when I caught another whiff of something wolfy.
I looked back at Mom. She was giving the Witch an intense scowl.
So I went after him.
I raced through the trees after the scent. I hardly noticed when it took me down a hill so steep that I had to run at top speed to keep from falling. In the distance above my head, Momโs dragon voice growled for me to come back. But I was already too far away for her fire-breath to reach me, and the smell of wolf was getting stronger.
It would be impossible to lose Mom anyway. I bet every dog, wolf, and squirrel in Washington and Oregon knew where she was. And with Mom making all that racket, maybe my future-friend wouldnโt notice me gaining on him.
At the bottom of the slope, a little brook swallowed all the smells. I sniffed around the rotting leaves on its banks trying to piece together the scattered bits of smell that remained.
When the trail went cold, I turned back uphill. I was still out of breath from all that sniffing when I reached the break in the trees where the howling was coming from.
Mom stood in the middle of a clearing, swiveling this way and that as her stubby ears tried to figure out which direction my snuffling was coming from. โOscar, get back here!โ she shouted to the sky. Finally, she spotted me and stabbed a finger at the ground. โOscar! Get over here!โ
โMom! Mom! Youโll never guess who Iโโ
โDonโt run off like that again!โ she said to squeeze out the last bit of anger before collapsing into a crouch. She held my head so she could scratch behind both ears while she kissed the spot between my eyes. I sat in her headlock for what felt like a dog-year with all that wolfy excitement still pounding in my chest.
When she was done, Mom stood up and said, โGood boyโ in a stiff voice, like she didnโt want anyone to think she was a softie.
โBut Mom!โ It was a real, liveโโ
โI have enough to worry about without you scaring the dog doo out of me like that.โ
โ...wolf," I finished, but she was already too busy scowling at the Witch to hear me.
