I don’t usually like it when Mom ties me up and goes somewhere without me, but with Lily there, I didn’t need to bark. While Mom went inside to order, I taught Lily about breakfast. “Here, let me show you how it works,” I coached. “First you say, I’d like a side of bacon. Then you ask, Can I get that with cheese? Now you try.” 

“No! Don’t tell me! Let me guess…” I tilted my head in a hmmm and waited, because I know how to do suspense, too. “It’s Batsquatch, right? He waits for them in his doorless cave at the tippity-top. When the herd least expects it, he pops out of solid rock and says Boo! Then the deer die quickly of a painless heart attack so they won’t feel it as he rips them to pieces like a stuffy toy. Right?”

“Drop the potato chips and no one gets hurt!” I barked, refusing the empty paw. 

“What the smell is that woman saying?” Mom grumbled the umptieth time I heard it. “Wait, you can hear it too?” 

“Don’t you dare take off!” Mom hissed, hooking her frozen claws around my collar and trapping me for monster meat. 

Before we even started our hike, we found a real treasure: an unlocked people-potty!

“Oh good! The horse came home after all. I knew we’d find a happy ending.” 

When the Weather Jinx spoke, the sky awoke. Right on cue, it darkened to a mominous grey and threw down a spat of rain while it gathered its clouds to show what it could really do. “I sure hope this weather breaks soon,” the Jinx jinxed. 

I waited, but there was no rumbling and no tumbling. I waited some more, but still no Mom fell out of the Mom-return slot. I would have to step onto her landing strip if I wanted to look for her. I was just about to take a cautious step onto the runway when I heard a whoosh.

When we dismounted, Mom hid behind the beak of her hat so that no one else in the car kennel could pick her out in a line-up.

Mom snapped her fingers like a flamenco dancer to get my attention. “Oscar! Oscar! C’mere. Up-up!” she begged like a paparazza, waving her paw over the rock like it was even more amazing than she originally thought.

“I have a surprise for you,” Mom said. I lifted my head and cocked my ears, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was looking at the Witch.

“I have a surprise for you,” Mom said. I lifted my head and cocked my ears, but she wasn’t looking at me. She was looking at the Witch.

It didn’t really matter where the Wagon was, as long as I was inside it with Mom. But what happens when your home goes back home?

It didn’t really matter where the Wagon was, as long as I was inside it with Mom. But what happens when your home goes back home?

“It’s beautiful!” Mom said, still in that ooey-gooey strawberry-shortcake voice. “This must be what enchantment feels like.”

“It’s beautiful!” Mom said, still in that ooey-gooey strawberry-shortcake voice. “This must be what enchantment feels like.”

“Silly dog. Nature deals luck randomly. We have to be prepared for anything so we can survive a bad hand until the cards are dealt again.”

“You don’t have to beat all of life’s levels by yourself. Sometimes someone has already made it easier, but you have to take their hints.”

“You don’t have to beat all of life’s levels by yourself. Sometimes someone has already made it easier, but you have to take their hints.”