Even though I need no introduction, I asked Mom to introduce my story by writing the furword to my book.

"Mom! No! How could you? I'm a celebrity. It'll be all over TMZ! And my fans will never recognize me with that on."

"Mom! No! How could you? I'm a celebrity. It'll be all over TMZ! And my fans will never recognize me with that on."

Questions like that are how Mom cheats at arguments. She knows that dogs can't tell the future like she can.

Pots clattered as she dug through the kitchen, searching for I-knew-not-what. She grunted triumphantly and pulled out the knife.

Pots clattered as she dug through the kitchen, searching for I-knew-not-what. She grunted triumphantly and pulled out the knife.

Screams filled the inside of the mailman van as the ghosts of all the dogless families he'd eaten rattled the bars.

Screams filled the inside of the mailman van as the ghosts of all the dogless families he'd eaten rattled the bars.

I couldn't tell if it was nature or civilization calling her back, just that Mom was accepting the call.

I couldn't tell if it was nature or civilization calling her back, just that Mom was accepting the call.

If you try to make everything look like the plan, then you're going to miss a lot and spend the whole adventure being frustrated.

If you try to make everything look like the plan, then you're going to miss a lot and spend the whole adventure being frustrated.

The car-house came to rest in a car kennel surrounded by sky. Only the crowns of a few mountains joined us in the sky, still dripping with

The car-house came to rest in a car kennel surrounded by sky. Only the crowns of a few mountains joined us in the sky, still dripping with

"Why would there be a parking lot if there were nothing to see? People who drive sedans don't go up a dirt road for nothing."

"Why would there be a parking lot if there were nothing to see? People who drive sedans don't go up a dirt road for nothing."

Death sat self-consciously behind them all, its bloodthirsty depths and time-stained teeth awkwardly out of place among the picnic tables, r

Death sat self-consciously behind them all, its bloodthirsty depths and time-stained teeth awkwardly out of place among the picnic tables, r

There was something creepy about being so close to something so big.

Oscar sees many magical things in Monument Valley and meets one of his heroes