“I think I know where the potatoes are coming from,” Mom said. “Hang onto your hat, Spud. This is gonna blow your mind.”

“I think I know where the potatoes are coming from,” Mom said. “Hang onto your hat, Spud. This is gonna blow your mind.”

“You don’t have to beat all of life’s levels by yourself. Sometimes someone has already made it easier, but you have to take their hints.”

I stepped into the river and made a big show of stopping for a drink to show the water that couldn’t push me around.

I stepped into the river and made a big show of stopping for a drink to show the water that couldn’t push me around.

“Mom! Guess what!” I wagged. “You’ll never guess who I just chased! He was extra fluffy and—“

“Mom! Guess what!” I wagged. “You’ll never guess who I just chased! He was extra fluffy and—“

“See!” Mom hooted. She clapped her hands and her surprised smile flickered in the firelight. “It wor... Oh.”

“See!” Mom hooted. She clapped her hands and her surprised smile flickered in the firelight. “It wor... Oh.”

“I don’t see why someone has to sit out in the rain all day just to do something for me that I’m perfectly capable of doing myself...”

“I don’t see why someone has to sit out in the rain all day just to do something for me that I’m perfectly capable of doing myself...”

The kaleidoscope of trees and moss fell into a pattern that made sense. “I’ve been here before!” I wagged.

The kaleidoscope of trees and moss fell into a pattern that made sense. “I’ve been here before!” I wagged.

“No, Mom!” I said with a subtle pull on the leash. “It’s a trap! He’s trying to dognap you!”

“No, Mom!” I said with a subtle pull on the leash. “It’s a trap! He’s trying to dognap you!”

She didn't even bother to unlock the mailman van before she descended on me with a hunerd pinching fingers.

She didn't even bother to unlock the mailman van before she descended on me with a hunerd pinching fingers.

The crowd went silent as everyone held their breath. The only noise on the farm was the chicka-chicka-chick of maracas. The squiggle snarled

The crowd went silent as everyone held their breath. The only noise on the farm was the chicka-chicka-chick of maracas. The squiggle snarled

Questions like that are how Mom cheats at arguments. She knows that dogs can't tell the future like she can.